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Barbie’s people

December 26, 2011
Barbie's neck

I hope these alien-looking faces are painted by machine. Either that or picture Chinese workers painting thousands of tiny little Barbie faces all day.

Not sure what planet her people evolved on. Mars, perhaps: darkness selecting for larger eyes and lower gravity for freakishly long limbs and neck.

Martians are naturally bald, but there’s a current fashion for hair based on Earth television, which they get together to watch for laughs.

H.G. Wells speculated that Martians wanted to invade Earth, and perhaps Barbie is the first wave of that invasion. When her people step off the spaceships, little children would run up to them with glee. “Look, mommy! It’s Barbie!”

Tomorrow: something even more horrifying than Barbie…

NOTES:

  • Have you read War Of The Worlds? That is a seriously awesome book. Here I’ll get you started: “…across the gulf of space, minds that are to our minds as ours are to those of the beasts that perish, intellects vast and cool and unsympathetic, regarded this earth with envious eyes, and slowly and surely drew their plans against us…”
Categories: Uncategorized
  1. paintedjaguar
    January 4, 2012 at 13:17 | #1

    How about Richard Burton reading the (abridged) intro to War of the Worlds? Nice, don’t you think?

    from Jeff Wayne’s Musical Version of The War of the Worlds

  2. decrepadmin
    January 4, 2012 at 14:20 | #2

    Cool! Though that animation of Burton is a bit creepy. Almost as if it were done by… Martians!

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