In which, inspired by some damn TV show, I reveal something embarrassing about myself

House has had its ups and downs, but tonight’s brilliant episode was about a sick blogger, so I had to watch.  The patient was one of those bloggers who reveals everything about her life, both physical and emotional, and had readers all over the world.  So the House team was combing her blog for clues to her Unrealistic Medical Mystery Of The Week.

Much of the episode focused on the question; “What is an appropriate amount of self-disclosure?”  There are generational and cultural components to that question.  My dad revealed personal information in the smallest possible micro-droplets, after carefully considering ways of, um, not.  A story from his early teaching career illustrates.

He was filling in as a school principal in a small town in Colorado.  The townsfolk had kept their distance from him, not talking much or inviting him to any events, so he was lonely.  One day he was eating lunch alone in the diner and the sheriff came in and sat down with him.  The place was empty.  The sheriff began to ask him questions about the family of one of the kids in the school.  He basically told the sheriff to go ask them if he wanted to know anything.

He had been certain that nobody heard the conversation, but somebody must have gotten the gist of it because afterward, people began to be more friendly to him.  He got on well and made many friends there.

On the other extreme I’ve known people who tell me stuff about themselves that I’d rather not know.  Context is important: in a blog it’s fine, but I’ve had people corner me in a store aisle and loudly start telling me about their divorce or their kids’ drug problem while I edge away.  It isn’t that I don’t care, it’s just that I am slow-witted in those situations.  I usually stammer some kind of lame sympathy.  (I’m no good at talking on the phone, either.)

Back to the the TV episode; Doctor Chase is saddened by the discovery that, despite his accomplishments in life, women are mainly attracted to him because he’s so handsome.  In that context the suggestion is made that relationships online might be less affected by how someone looks and in that respect, be more “real”. 

But what to disclose online?  Doctor Wilson is mortified when it becomes public knowledge that that he once starred in a film that was later edited into a porno.  He sets out to embarrass House - an almost impossible task when it concerns a person who openly gambles and consorts with prostitutes.

What would embarrass me?  Hell, I’ve already admitted online that I voted twice for Ronald Reagan, so we know I’m not a quick study.  I’ve written that I only pretend to understand why people are offended by sarcasm.  I have never attempted to hide the fact that I just don’t understand sports or James Bond movies.  I did two detailed posts about gory details of my surgery last year.  My dad’s head would explode if he knew some of the stuff I’ve written in 8 years of blogging. 

But at least I’m not tortured by any thoughts that people only like me for my looks…  That one’s on doctor Chase.

Maybe the only embarrassing thing I can reveal online is that I suspect that I’m rather shallow.  You’d think that after failing at so many things I’d have something deeper to say about failure than; “Don’t despair, get up and try again.”  After the medical problems I’ve experienced I should be able to write something more reassuring than; “Don’t get too comfortable.  Comfort makes you more vulnerable to pain.”  After reading thousands of books and meeting so many brilliant, amazing people I should have learned something more profound than “Live by your values, not by your fears.”  Or not to suspect that possibly there isn’t anything more profound than that.

OK how’s this: I cried at the end of 50 First Dates.  Maybe it was Adam Sandler’s egg-shaped head.  Nah, everyone already knows I’m a sap.

Posted by George on 03/08/10 at 11:29 PM
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Oh right, the Oscars…

The Oscars are on right now.  Like the State Of The Union address, I always just catch the summary the next day.  But if District 9 does not hop out of there on its weird insectoid legs with an armload of Oscars, I will once again be reminded that it’s all a sham. 

Since there’s nothing on television, I’m going out for peanut butter and crackers.

See also,

Posted by George on 03/07/10 at 08:49 PM
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Unstoppable pedestrians

This winter the campus began putting plastic chains across non-essential stairways:

From my photo album, Notes

Left of the railing is where the stairs are.  To the right of the railing, is just snow-covered incline.

 

Posted by George on 03/02/10 at 11:11 PM
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Toyota accelerators and a sense of proportion

Supposedly in the last ten years 56 people have perished in Toyota accelerator-related accidents, for which reason the company sent out 10 million recall notices.  We’ll come back to that number in a moment.  But if they’re found to have done something negligent, yeah; absolutely fine them, hold them to account.  Not because I think Toyota won’t fix the problems otherwise (Toyota CEO Akio Toyoda seems to have a pretty good grasp on the company’s long-term interests) but because it’s only fair to hold all car makers to the same standard.

Now about that number: 56 people, over the years.  Just for the hell of it, let’s double that number and compare it to Pinto deaths and SUV rollover deaths (to say nothing of people who died in regular cars struck by jacked-up SUV’s), or even the roughly 16,000 Americans who die every year from internal bleeding caused by NSAID pain relievers.  Or 18,000 annually from MRSA, which is directly attributable to overuse of antibiotics in medicine and especially in the livestock industry.  Or four hundred thousand deaths every year from smoking.

And we’re holding congressional hearings on Toyota accelerators?  I know this song: it’s “Let’s ding the foreign car maker!”  Except that the Toyota Camry is the “most American-made car”, so that doesn’t even make sense.

How about if we get a sense of proportion, then? Toyota accelerators should be an NTSA issue.  Instead let’s turn the cameras on Senators who don’t seem to care that 45,000 Americans die each year from lack of health insurance.  Let’s find out exactly why their elected representatives are so satisfied with the status quo.  Maybe their campaign financing would offer a clue.

NOTES:

Posted by George on 03/01/10 at 07:15 PM
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Slavery, ongoing

Over the weekend MrsDoF and I went to see this year’s Oscar Shorts, a collection of short animated and live-action films.  One of the films was Kavi, about a young boy who is enslaved making bricks, and wishes he could go to school.  Here’s the trailer:

Kavi (www.KaviTheMovie.com) from Gregg Helvey on Vimeo.

Kavi and his family make bricks for a tyrannical owner who uses the pretext of intractable debt to enslave them all.  At the end of the movie, he makes a desperate gamble.  I wish they’d put the whole thing up on Vimeo or YouTube or something.

Posted by George on 03/01/10 at 06:05 AM
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Alas, poor mouse, I knew him well…

I was cleaning up in the basement and found this 1992 Microsoft mouse, and before throwing it out decided some procrastination was in order.  So I photographed it in various stages of disassembly. 

From my photo album; Technology

I don’t know why, exactly, except that I always thought it was a clever mechanism.  And it’s interesting to contemplate the days when a computer mouse cost over a hundred dollars, and how they had to be taken apart occasionally to remove fibers from the optical encoding disks. 

Today we all use “optical” mice, but as far as I know the mouse has been an optical device since the first prototype in 1963.

It’s also neat to see the fine engineering that went into this device.  It had considerable heft - the ball was finely rubber-coated steel and its internal steel frame added weight as well.  The encoding disk was sharply cut on the emitter side but had angled ports on the sensor side to prevent internal reflections, resulting in a more defined signal.  And so on.  I uploaded 7 photos to the album, in case you are giving a lecture on technology history and need illustrations or something.  Or just want to make jokes about mouse balls.

I’m going to use the microswitches in my next little project, which is to convert a Nintendo Wii-shaped candy dispenser into a 5mw green laser pointer.  A little piece of the past living on in a toy.

OK back to cleaning up the basement now.

Posted by George on 02/28/10 at 04:50 PM
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Science is culture, autotuned

Feynman: “I don’t feel frightened by not knowing things.  I think it’s much more interesting.”

I’m flattened by the irony of Templeton Foundation types who say; “Well science doesn’t know everything”.  That’s exactly the point.  In science we can pursue the unknown instead of making up mythological answers about it.  We’re allowed, encouraged to disprove anything in science, if we can; each instance a course-correction toward better understanding the universe.

Posted by George on 02/27/10 at 10:57 AM
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How the valuable “team player” can help you destroy YOUR organization.

You probably know the story by now: Pennsylvania school district gives laptops to kids, then uses the laptops to spy on them. And by “spying” I mean; “remotely take pictures through the built-in webcam in the students’ bedrooms”.  The students didn’t know about it, or know the reason why it was a violation of the “code of conduct” to disable the webcam.  Now the FBI is investigating.

These people are in big trouble.  They violated several very important laws (normally you have to be Dick Cheney to get away with such) that can land them in prison.  They exposed their school district to the mother of all class-action suits.  And they undermined every laptop loan program in the country, abusing and destroying trust.  It was a spectacularly dumb move, setting up and using the spy system.

Thing is; it wasn’t just one or two people.  You know how this works: a committee had to put out an RFP for the software system, and review competing systems.  Some pointy-haired boss had to approve the purchase. Unless their legal council is incompetent, they omitted asking him/her.  Technicians had to install the software and train school officials in its use.  School principals had access to the pictures and thought it would be a good idea to confront a student with one of them.  The kid was eating candy, which the principal mistook for “pills”, and called the kid into his office.  See!  Here’s the evidence, kid.  Of the school district committing a crime, that is.

There were so many exit ramps on the road between initial dumb idea, and pathetic national news story.  At any point someone could have said; “Go ask your lawyers. This is wrong, you know it’s wrong, and you’re not going to do it or I’m going to the parents and the press.”  And the pointy-haired bosses would have been angry but a quick consult with school district legal council would have revealed the objecting person as a valuable asset.  It would go something like this:

(School district attorney: “You surely weren’t going to actually DO this, were you?”)

Pot holes of stupidity are seldom this deep, but organizations take the dumb road all the time, and they’re set up to reward “team players” while punishing individuals who raise objections.  It’s true in politics, in religion, in education, and in business.  When the project is completed, everyone slaps everyone else on the back and it’s attaboys all around.  Status quo, stupidity, cupidity, mendacity and just plain bull-headedness wins the day.

It’s easy to think of dumb corporate decisions that became news: Enron, Ken Lay, or local stuff like the city arena that we were told would make a profit when everyone knew it wouldn’t (actual case).  Or the church camp that was caught burying several barrels of chlordane next to the lake to save the cost of proper disposal (another actual case).  In situations like that, who’s the most valuable team member: the “team player”?  Or the one who says; “If you’re going to be this stupid, count me out.”

I would love to hear some ideas for developing institutional baloney detectors, and turning the usual value equation around.

NOTES… see also:

Posted by George on 02/25/10 at 11:26 PM
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Stupidly worded poll

I don’t know what “GMTV” is, but from their website, here’s a remarkably stupid poll: Could you live without technology?

Unless you are one of a tiny handful of self-sufficient hermits the answer is no, you couldn’t.  It has nothing to do with your Blackberry; if all “technology” (depending how you define it) disappeared tomorrow, most of the world’s population would die rather horribly before things settled down to a brutish and short medieval existence.  You know - back when all food was organic and everyone lived in harmony with Nature, including the plague, intestinal parasites, and death from preventable diseases and treatable injuries.  And most of us never traveled further than 50 miles from the place of our births in our entire lives. If “Nature” were your mother, she’d be in prison for child abuse and neglect.

I know, I know; “stupidly worded poll” is almost a redundancy.

Posted by George on 02/22/10 at 10:07 PM
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Sunday morning portal to Hell

Amazing the things you find in ordinary places:

From Notes

Spotted under the Linden Street bridge in Normal, Illinois, a few blocks South of the police station.  I expected it to be under a bridge, sure, but here?  Not in, maybe, Rome, or London, or some other place that more than .000002% of the world’s population have heard of?  I guess old Scratch just has the common touch.  Or maybe lots of portals.

Posted by George on 02/20/10 at 06:45 PM
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Things I should have blogged, but didn’t

Some unblogged bits that really got my attention.  In reverse order of seriousity:

And no, to the best of my knowledge, “seriousity” is not a cromulent word.

Posted by George on 02/19/10 at 10:11 PM
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The octogenarian meets Linux, part 3

A couple weeks ago I sent my mother a Linux machine and promised to let you know how it turned out.

She seems to like it just fine.  I suppose mileage would vary depending on what she wanted to do with it, but mostly it’s an Internet machine. 

The system is based on a tiny Intel motherboard with an integrated Atom processor, with 2 gb RAM, in a box about the size of a 2-slice toaster.  The barebones kit was only $170, and I added a DVD burner for $25 and an old 320 GB hard drive that I had in my box of comput-o-leftovers.  Then I installed Ubuntu 9.10, and she used her existing monitor, keyboard, mouse and printer.  Since her last machine was pushing 8 years old, it was time for… something.

Someone asked me yesterday; “Linux!  Is she coding Perl on it now?”

Um… no.  But from all indications she’s using it successfully.  I’ve done a couple introductory support calls, where we explored the Ubuntu desktop and got her printer set up.  She’s surfing the web, and Gmail on broadband seems to be more practical for her than Juno on dial-up. If you need a net machine (or for that matter it’s a pretty decent computer in its own right) this is a combination worth considering.  I’ll keep you posted on her exploration of Linux as developments occur.  Especially if she suddenly starts coding Perl.

Posted by George on 02/19/10 at 10:17 AM
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What would they have thought?

On my “cardio-theater” (which consists of a small DVD player on a shelf in front of my treadmill) I’m watching the first season of Heroes.  It’s a good show, and each episode ends with a fast-stepping, very cool but somewhat creepy little bit of theme music.

I’ve always wondered what people would think if you went back to some historical era and played modern music (presumably with the instruments of the time).  Would people in 700 AD “get” that music at all?  Or the theme music from “Jurassic Park”?  Anything by Philip Glass? Would it make any emotional sense at all? 

Maybe Hiro Nakumura could tell us.  But speaking of Hiro, while looking up his name, I noticed you can buy your very own Samurai sword just like his. It’s a real sword made of tempered steel and even has the Heroes logo on it.  I hope people who buy it realize that in addition to being a nifty bit of show memorabilia, it is also a deadly weapon.

Posted by George on 02/17/10 at 09:54 PM
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Holly is doing a little better this morning
From Cats

This picture is from five years ago; she always had a slight build. 

Now, she’s frail.  The Vet asked MrsDoF if we were sure she’s only 14.  Yes, we are, and her brother Oscar is hale and healthy despite an arthritic hip.  But she’s not doing well, down to only 8 lbs and Sunday she hardly moved at all.

Still, she seems to have perked up a bit since the vet.  A shot of antibiotics, and now insulin she’ll receive in addition to her thyroid medicine.  Maybe it’s selfish, but I didn’t want her to go in Winter.  She loves being outside in the warm sun.

Posted by George on 02/17/10 at 07:49 AM
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Tipping the balance back

There are moments when you sense the balance is tipping.  Waking up in the Emergency Room, or going back after a surgery failed, or waving off the nurse who explains how a morphine pump works, because you know all about morphine pumps.  The funny thing is that although modern medicine has saved my life many times, without it, I’d only have died once.  In horrible, agonizing pain, but just once.

Each of those situations needed recovery, physical therapy, exercises.  Each was a road back, but they were all obvious from the outside.  Sometimes they overlap.  The one from last summer is ongoing.

Some of them are just little signs, though; a jar you can’t open, or like today, a friendly handshake that brings tears to your eyes.  I’m doing fist-bumps from now on.  But I can’t use the excuse of being afraid of germs; nobody would look at my desk and believe that. 

It’s getting more interesting, tipping the balance back every time.  Sort of a game.

Posted by George on 02/16/10 at 09:42 PM
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