Review of Narnia: Lion, Witch, Wardrobe
The Mrs & I went to see Narnia (Lion, Witch, Wardrobe) this evening, and it was pretty good (OK, it would have been totally mind-blowing twenty years ago). So I’ll add my observations to the chorus of other reviews that I have seen:
- How did “The Professor” (who was really quite a jovial fellow) find himself saddled with such an unpleasant housekeeper?
- I now understand the person who said; “I started to read the book once, but gave up when it became clear the four children would not meet a grisly end”
- In particular, I wanted to feed the one named Lucy to the wolves, then stand and watch
- Speaking of wolves, If I’m holding a massive, razor-sharp sword, any conversation I have with a trash-talking wolf will be very brief
- Movie children are immune to hypothermia
- Special effects were quite invisible. So far as one could tell, the movie featured a cast of actual mythical creatures with no special effects
- After decades of cinematic aliens, we’re not so impressed with wierd characters anymore
- If beavers could talk, they’d be hard-working common blokes who bicker with their spouses
- The Phoenix, though a cameo character, was the coolest, followed by the Griffin
- Despite the disclaimer toward the end, Aslan did seem pretty tame
- I liked Liam Neeson better as Alfred Kinsey
- A cheetah can run only slightly faster than a horse, at least in Narnia
- I kept expecting to hear the White Witch say “Resistance is futile: you will be assimilated”. Not the same actress, but she certainly had the ‘Evil Queen’ thing down solid
- Anyone who misses the clumsy symbolism in the movie is either a dolt or is completely innocent of Christian mythology
- At the end after they
blow up the Death Star, uh, I mean after Aslan kills the witch (Sorry, that was a spoiler there, wasn’t it?), I missed Princess Leia handing out the medallions
If you have very young children, discuss scary movies with them before going and make a determination if they can make it all the way through. There are no gory scenes but a couple spots that are a bit tough on sensitive kids (the couple next to us had to miss most of the movie because the children were scared).
Compared to Lord Of The Rings, this is pretty thin stuff. I enjoyed it, though, and I’ll certainly go see the sequals.