TSA HULK is green monster of compassionate insight
Who could fail to be moved by stories of cruel TSA agents traumatizing little kids, rape victims, and wives of heroic pilots? Threatening Draconian fines against people who just say; “Screw this, I’m taking the train!”? Zapping us with x-rays? (Unlike cell-phone radiation, the x-rays used in airport scanners are high-energy enough to be a real concern.) TSA agents have been foolish enough to tangle with Penn Jilette. There’s even a TSA HULK on Twitter, who said something very interesting:
HULK FEEL SORRY FOR PEOPLE HAVE TO DO PATDOWN AND GET PAID CRAP FOR GROPING AND JUST TRYING TO DO JOB. MUST GO SMASH NOW. #TSA
I guarantee we will hear more stories of sadistic, perverted TSA agents fondling women and kids. Any organization that large will have its share of pervs. But spare a thought for the poor schlubb who finally found a stable job in a tough economy, only to have it morph into something they never bargained for. No ordinary person wants to do that, and by definition most people are ordinary. Even most TSA agents. They’re thinking; “I have to ‘encounter testicular resistance’ on little kids? Really?”
And Thanksgiving is right around the corner. Yea! We’re going to go see Grandma! What will it be; the naked x-rays, or the assaultive fondling? Get ready for some really tough stories out of the holiday travel season.
We have ourselves to blame for this, by the way. When you elevate any one principle above all others, absurdity is the inevitable result. For example, if you elevate “Security” above “Common Sense” you get security theater, in which a great show is made of being Tough On Terrorism while actual terrorists laugh at us for the circles we’re running in.
- Nobody wants their privates photographed or fondled, but some people have more reason than others. About 1 out of 1500 people are born with ambiguous genitalia – they’d just as soon not have that known to strangers every time they travel. Transgender people who live as their gender of identity but who have not had surgical treatments will face unwelcome scrutiny. Cancer survivors with prosthetic breasts. Anyone with any kind of prosthesis. And of course rape victims, children, and people with unusually strong standards of modesty.
- Johns Hopkins doctor on TSA Scanners: “Someone is going to get cancer from those x-rays”. It is difficult to calculate the odds of course but generally about the same as being in a terrorist attack in the first place. Except for one thing: some people travel a LOT and anyway, are we planning on doing this forever? Your kids may have 70 years of flying ahead of them.
- Seriously, think twice before letting your child step into that scanner, or be touched by an agent, however well-intentioned.
- Amtrak, anyone?