Is there any safety idea too stupid to get on TV?
Now you can provide on the spot protection against guns and knife violence!
Independently tested to the standards set by the National Institute for Justice to provide Level II ballistic protection, as found in most police body armor, at almost 1/10 the weight.
Yeah, because it only covers a small area on your child’s back, not the torso and vital organs like a police vest. But hey, it could help! The company’s website paints a pretty grim picture of school safety:
Since 1999 over 328 incidents have occurred, leaving 229 dead and 422 injured in school violence alone. That is an average of about 1 per week since the Columbine Tragedy. In almost 97% of these documented incidents, MJ Safety Solutions backpack could have provided the ballistic protection that could have saved lives.
Wait a minute. Even assuming these statistics weren’t from the general proving grounds of Charmin bathroom tissue, (and I strongly suspect that to be the case) there are something like 88,000 public schools in this country. Columbine was around 3,000 days ago so that’s around 264 million school days. Divided by 328 incidents, on any given school day your child would have roughly one in eight hundred thousand chance of an “incident” happening at his school…
This backpack can provide life saving defense for anyone: school children, educators, journalists and tourists to name a few. This is a full size, ultra leightweight backpack packed with features to make it practical for everyone.
…divided by the chance that the incident would even involve your child (schools are big places and most of the incidents are small-scale) and the vague subset of those cases where your child could turn around and present his or her backpack to the line of fire or the path of a knife at just the right instant to stop a bullet. I think that works out to about a one in 792 skabillion chance this backpack would ever do anything except be damned uncomfortable on the school bus.
And incidentally, how many handgun rounds could pass through a fully loaded school backpack? Have you looked at kids’ textbooks lately? This very thought has come up before. Just when you thought a safety idea couldn’t get ANY dumber, how about proposing keeping old textbooks under childrens’ desks as bulletproof shields? Yes, someone actually proposed that. :gulp:
I wonder what percentage of those “incidents” involved one kid clobbering another kid with his backpack?